What would you do?

Discussion in 'Christian Issues' started by kbabe1968, Oct 12, 2008.

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  1. kbabe1968

    kbabe1968 New Member

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    I'm posting this here...hoping not to offend anyone.

    We are believers.

    We are part of a secular co-op loose affiliation (we don't meet regularly, but if a person wants to set up a field trip, they organize, we do it, etc.).

    There's going to be a really neat Thanksgiving event happening the week before. They're having a couple people come out from a local village project where they live like the pilgrims, etc. They'll give a talk and we'll share a very traditional (i.e. Pilgrim & Indian traditional - not "American" traditional) meal.

    I just discovered the hosts of this event (after signing up and commiting to go) are alternate lifestyle life-long "married" partners.

    Would you go? Would you not? WHy or why not? We are praying about what to do. On one hand, i do not want to expose my children to something I'm not ready to explain in enough detail. On the other, how is it showing them the love of Christ to boycott them?

    A few families are "up in arms" and pulling out. What does that say?

    I'm still not sure what we're going to do. What would YOU do?

    Praying about it.
     
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  3. KrisRV

    KrisRV New Member

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    well me I would go I like to give everyone a change, and to truthful with you, my kids more then likely wouldn't know unless adult told them, Then would think nothing of it. But, thats my opinon.
     
  4. Birbitt

    Birbitt New Member

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    I would go. I would probably be a little "on guard" so to speak about my children and what they may observe but I would definately go. The Bible tells us to love the sinner and hate the sin so in my opinion not going would be the wrong thing to do unless the event was to promote "alternate" lifestyle living in some way. Seriously just pray that the Lord gives you strength at the event and that your children don't observe any inappropriate behavior and go and enjoy it!
     
  5. sixcloar

    sixcloar New Member

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    I think this is what I would do also, especially since you committed to it.
     
  6. Tbog

    Tbog New Member

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    Seriously? As a Christian, I understand your concern, but it isnt like they will be making out in front of your kids or anything. I would go.
     
  7. squarepeg

    squarepeg New Member

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    I agree with the others....hate the sin, not the sinner. As long as they are not forcing it down your throat, I don't see a problem.

    I would pray, go, and be prepared to leave if it becomes uncomfortable or questionable. (say, if they started holding hands, other gestures, etc.)
    Just my opinion.
     
  8. Emma's#1fan

    Emma's#1fan Active Member

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    I agree!
     
  9. Autumnleavz

    Autumnleavz New Member

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    Well, I personally would go. I too am a believer but I have a live and let live belief.
    I seriously doubt that these people are going to act out of the way of what you're wanting in front of the kids. They are not going to be kissing (as Tbog pointed out) and they are not going to go into a discussion about their lifestyle choice or acting inappropriately . They will do what you have asked them to by putting on this q&a session about pilgrims.
    Most kids honestly do not even notice anything unless parents point it out or make a big deal about it.
    So in short, I would still go.
     
  10. pecangrove

    pecangrove New Member

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    I don't think I would have signed up for it if I had known from the start, but seeing as how you found out after the fact, then I would still go. Same as the others, if physical gestures are made that would cause concern then of course I would leave, but I imagine they are there just to entertain/educate the children.
    I have a cousin that I've always been close to, and although he has not come out to the family, it is absolutely obvious that he is gay. Now, my son does talk and play around with him, and I love him dearly, though I am totally against his lifestyle choices. He is always welcome at my house (except when DH is there... not that DH would ask him to leave but I don't think he'd feel very welcome, either :(), but he would not be welcome if he brought a boyfriend with him or something like that.
    You can't shelter your children from life, but I also don't want it seemingly accepted by me in front of my children, either.
    Hope this helps!!!
     
  11. Jackie

    Jackie Active Member

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    What do you mean by "hosts"? Is this a "family" in the co-op who is organizing the trip, or the people doing the program?

    If it is the "family" in the co-op, I would go. If you are accepting this "family", then you must do so, unless you plan to pull out all-together from the co-op.

    If it's the people organizing the presentation, I would consider pulling out, as I would question whether the info the present on pilgrims is accurate or politically correct. I cannot see them honestly presenting the fact that the Pilgrims gave thanks to God for His provision throughout the year. (I have seen presentations that say that Thanksgiving for the Pilgrims to thank the Indians for their help.) If it's not a PC presentation and one of the leading people just happened to be gay, I might stay in.
     
    Last edited: Oct 12, 2008
  12. eyeofthestorm

    eyeofthestorm Active Member

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    I am guessing you don't know this couple well, or you would either more clearly feel at ease...or clearly NOT comforable attending.

    My DH and I have made acquaintances, through work, with same-sex couples. Both couples were women, and both were long-term relationships (longer than we've been married). Both couples were extrememly down to earth. I never saw any sort of inappropriate display of affection from either couple in any of the times we spent in their company (not at work). On this particular topic, I figure anything I wouldn't want my kids to see I wouldn't want them to see between a heterosexual couple, either - with the exception of me and their dad, and at home...and not too much of that, either. After all, private is private.:eek:

    Now, for me, the concern would be not knowing them. There are all kinds of difficult people in the world. But I would take the chance and go, and just take my leave is something I was uncomfortable with took place (but hey - if they begin to behave inappropriately around the children, you probably won't be the only family leaving).

    We are also believers who are part of secular homeschool groups. We aren't very active (my kids are young, they really only need park days and the occasional field trip - no classes). One secular group is VERY anti-Christian. Many members (some are Jewish, some are I-don't-know-what) have told hair raising stories about how they've been treated by churches and people who profess Christianity. While I sympathize with their experiences (I actually avoided several of these hs groups myself), I'm sure they had no idea how uncomfortable they were making me. I decided in that moment I could be a better witness through actions than words. Sharing that we were church goers didn't be a very advantageous move at the time. The other secular group (with a lot of member overlap), is much more accepting of those of us who are churched. I find it a very difficult line to walk. I remind myself that Jesus ate with the prostitutes and the tax collectors, and I ask myself who are today's "prostitutes" and "tax collectors?"
     
  13. becky

    becky New Member

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    Since they are doing this for the public, I can't believe they'd do something dense in front of everyone. If it goes that way, though, lay someone out over it!

    There is a lesbian couple in my family, ladies who are in their 60's. I know them all my 43 years, and they'd never do anything offensive in public.
     
  14. Autumnleavz

    Autumnleavz New Member

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    You have summed it all up in one fail swoop! :D We are to love EVERYONE, treat everyone with love and respect, regardless. Who are we to be judge and prosecutor?
     
  15. Tbog

    Tbog New Member

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    Honestly, I would be just as offended if a straight couple were making pda's in front of a group of kids. No, I dont agree with homosexuality, but I think that couples leading a class should be respectful of kids, regardless of their sexual orientation.
     
  16. kbabe1968

    kbabe1968 New Member

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    Sorry for my silence. We're out of town, and I only have internet for one day! LOL :D We didn't know the hotel charged for it...now we do. Hubby said he could write off one day as a business expense, not 5! LOL :D

    Thanks.

    It is my initial reaction to go to the event and just leave if I see something inapropriate. My fear in advance warning my kids is for one of them to blurt out something unloving or inappropriate to the event in regards to their lifestyle. I do NOT know them, but my one friend who homeschools lives right across the street from them. They also believe themselves to be christians (they attend a very accepting denomination that choses to ignore - or write off verses regarding homosexuality).

    This only came up as a question b/c one of my friends who did not know and found out after the fact is concerned about it. Even when I mentioned to my husband about it, his response was "Love the sinner, hate the sin". He also said if we were the ONLY Christians going to the event, he'd probably prefer we pull out. But if there are other Christians there, he's less concerned.

    I do not even know if BOTH will be there. I'm assuming one is stay at home, and the other works full time. I was thinking mainly of family photographs, etc. around the house and how unusual that would look and how to explain to my kids in a kind - non-judgemental way.

    Thanks a;;!!!
     
  17. seekingmyLord

    seekingmyLord Active Member

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    I have questions about this...and I am not trying to cause a problem, just asking you if you have thought of it from this perspective because I have struggled with something similar in the past when I was in a small inclusive homeschooling group with an out-spoken Pagan and a hard-core Atheist.

    These are just rhetorical questions, by the way.

    Do you seek the Lord about every outing?
    Do you go only to the ones He has given you a clear message about?

    It seems to me that you already made the decision to go. For me, the question I would have is did the Lord give this message to me as a sign He does not want for us to go or is it irrelevant?

    I really don't know what He wants you to do, but I would seek Him on the matter.
     
    Last edited: Oct 15, 2008
  18. MonkeyMamma

    MonkeyMamma New Member

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    I'm not offended but very shocked at this whole thing. I'm having a hard time grasping this. Why would you be worried about being around a homosexual couple? It isn't going to rub off on you or anything. They aren't going to try and recruit you. Are there really people that worried about "the gays" like this? They are everywhere! Everywhere you go on a daily basis there are both hetero and homosexual people, both good and bad people. Personally I'd be worried about the creepy straight guys that walk the mall looking at kids or something like that before I'd worry about a loving homosexual couple. My best friend is a lesbian and that is why I am having a hard time grasping this. I can't imagine someone having this conversation about her and her partner of 12 years. They are two of the coolest most loving amazing parents I know and for someone to worry about their kids being around them is just beyond me. I don't mean to sound rude but really this is bizarre to me.
     
  19. mamaof3peas

    mamaof3peas New Member

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    seekingmyLord, you took the words out of my mouth

    i feel like yes, i was going to go before i found this out. i felt like the Lord was leading us to go. then if i find out the couple is homosexual, and i have my reservations, i think that is the Lord or the Holy Spirit leading me away. I truly believe that in everything we are to seek the Lords guidance and everything we do should glorify the Lord. is attending this going to glorify the Lord?

    yes, i know that eventually you dc will have to know about homosexuality, but why expose them before they can even grasp it? i think that would be so confusing to them.

    but i feel the same with heteros out of wedlock, i dont want my kids exposed to such things, and i want them to have a firm foundation of what God's will is for his children before they are faced with seeing the other sinful side and maybe getting the wrong ideas about that

    please dont get me wrong, im not trying to judge, but i do believe that is one reason i homeschool. i want my kids foundation to be built and strong before they get bombarded with all of this worlds sins.
     
  20. Jackie

    Jackie Active Member

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    3Peas, you say you felt the Lord was leading you toward going, until you learned this. I don't think He would lead you one way, and then, as soon as you learned He would lead you a different way. I mean, He already knew when you felt you were being led in one direction. If He didn't want you around them, I would think He would have put that in your heart, an uneasiness about going from the very first, even if you didn't know why. And again, are you willing to back away from EVERYTHING in this group just because of this one couple?
     
  21. Healthy Skeptic

    Healthy Skeptic New Member

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    I did not read the other posts. Hope I don't repeat.

    My opinion is no way. The Bible says 'Above all guard your heart'. Our job is to protect our children and lay a firm foundation. It also states 'be innocent of evil'.

    I do not believe in compromising at all. I think for me to go to something like this with my children, is not toleration (the pc word), but compromise.

    I would not worry about what they may think about you. Right now you are protecting your children. You are not being unloving to them, you are putting your children first.

    I know I am not PC at all with this advice.

    It is different if it is just you, but this involves your children. And you must be cautious. There will come a time when you will loosen the grip, but for now. Lay your foundation and do not compromise.

    It is so hard in this world, cause we always here, love ~ love ~ love, don't hate.

    I have had a few Homosexual friends in the past. But I would never subject my vulnerable children to the lies and life that they lead.

    I hope this is making sense. Sometimes I wonder.

    If you are worried about how it will make other Christians or God look. Don't. God can take care of himself and us too for that matter.
     
    Last edited: Oct 15, 2008
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