Thinking of y ou today as one of our little friends is going through the same thing due to a motorcycle accident. Praying for you as often as the Lord gives you rememberance!
Thanks Aggie. TM, I was rushed in my last post. I was going to say that I am sorry to hear about that. It is always so heartbreaking. I always remember hearing of women losing their husbands when they were young, and my heart went out to them. But I had no idea how truly heart breaking it is for them. I'm kind of to the point where I don't want to do anything. I'm down and I want to crash on the couch and watch t.v. under the blanket and not worry about the to-do lists or my school. We have co-op and some business to take care of today...and I don't want to go. Don't want to do anything. I'm going to have to take my husband's work stuff in soon, probably this week and I don't want it. There's something just so final about it. But we're hanging in there. Thanks for your prayers.
Autumn, you are so loved! Wish we lived close enough so some of us could watch your kids while others took you out to lunch or Starbucks! Wouldn't make things "all better", but at least it would get you with people who care and give you a break!
Autumnn I was thinking on your schooling, not the kids, wondering what degree you are working for and if you are taking on line classes or what? I was praying for your kids and then remembered you have school too and began wondering , sorry if thats nosey. I am praying this morning for strength for the day and for the kids and your schooling to go smoothly. That you would be able to have a somewhat normal day and for miraculous financial increase. ( I don't always pray for miracles I just though tto do so today). I hope all is fair today and you get lots of hugs from your son and dd. HUGS from us!
Autumn, I've been following this thread and praying, but I haven't commented because I didn't know what to say. But after reading your last post, well I remember loosing my step-father just before my senior year of high school. My mom was only 39. and he was her second husband. I remember how heart broken my mother was, she couldn't stand to be alone not for a minute. I stayed by her side for weeks/months, I never left the house for anything that wasn't school/necessary. She went to work, and while she was at work I was at school. When I came home I cleaned the house, and made dinner. It was really hard on my mom, and me, but I remember doing all I could to help make it easier for her. It took her almost months to take his work keys/stuff in to work, but he actually passed away at work so that made it even harder. It did get better for my mom with time, and probably after about a month she started to get back to normal, but she hated to be alone for a long time after that (a year or more) even now (she's remarried) when her husband goes to work she worries, actually she worried so much that she got a job working with him. I wrote all this to tell you that even though it seems so hard now, your steps will get easier with each passing day and there will come a time when you will be able to remember your husband with fondness instead of pain from the loss, though there will always be days when his loss seems so raw and hard to deal with. My prayers and thoughts are with you during this time. You will make it through this, for now just let God carry you until you can stand.
Autumn, I agree with Birbitt, it does get easier with time, but I know it doesn't seem like that right now. I also, agree with Jackie I wish we were closer to take so load off your shoulder, we are all thinking of you and remember if theres anything you need ask away and we will do our best to help. Remember to take care of yourself your children need you more now then ever. Yes, when you have days like that take them,watch a movie and rest.. cry when you need to cry, don't feel like you are weak because you cry, we all need to cry, I only know you on line and cried more this last month for you then I have in along time. I do mean it if you need to talk pm me and I can call you.
Thanks guys, I appreciate it. TM...I take online classes through the local community college. I'm going for a general studies associates right now, so that I can hopefully transfer and maybe get a bachelor's in professional writing. So right now, I can still do my school work but the only problem is my exams. I have to go into college to take them. We never had childcare of any sort. We typically always took the kids with us when we went anywhere. And with my exams, I could just get ready and leave them with Daddy while I took them. I feel so bad asking for people to watch them now. I have always felt like that was imposing. I'm going to see if I can take them to either their mamaw or papaw (divorced) for my next ones. It's a bit of a drive, but that would be better than asking others since I don't want to overuse my welcome. I cannot tell you all how helpful you all have been to me. I know that we've never met but you all are supporting me more than you can imagine. I can feel that you all are here for me and that means a lot. gotta go try to do some school now.
DON'T FEEL BAD!!! You are in a very difficult situation right now. I'm sure you've had plenty of people tell you "If there's anything I can do to help...." Sure, some of them were just talking, but some of them REALLY MEANT IT! I've no doubt there are plenty of people around you who would help out if only they knew how. TAKE THEM UP ON IT!!! Call and ask if they can watch the kids while you take your exam. Or the next time someone says, "If there's anything I can do to help...." reply, "Well, now that you mention it, I could really use someone to watch the kids while I take my exams...." I know we'd be willing, if only we lived closer. (Figure it makes them feel better, knowing they were able to actually DO something tangible to help you!)
I agree with Jackie do not feeel bad, ! I was telling my dd that I am going to offer to take care of the kids at school who lost thier dad. One is a 5th grade the rest are younger and mom looked so worn out when picking them up yesterday. So reading this post today I am sure I should offer, she would probably feel the same way not wanting to bother someone. So accept the help peoples offer that are near, and we all will keep on encouraging you from afar, On the school note, thats great you can do stuff at home online classes and all! I am sure it helps keep things smoother for kids too, you are so amazing. the little bit of need to have someone else ther stuff is important though so get the people to watch them that y ou can, they wont mind really! Unless maybe if your kids flush the cat down the toilet or something like that? lol
I second this. Unless your friends have ever been in a similar situation, they are probably clueless as to how to help despite their great desire to "do something" for you. I have been a cluelss friend at times and I tell you that your friends will be very pleased if you tell them what you need. Most of them would lasso the moon for you right now, if you asked, so they won't even blink at providing a few hours of childcare.
I also want to say don't feel bad. I want to add that your friends will gladly welcome the chance to help you. At a time like this we feel so powerless and wish that there was some way we could have prevented it. Even while knowing there was nothing to be done. As odd as it sounds they need to do this. To be able to assist you in any way will help them heal as well. It is by helping others that I feel the best about myself. It is what our Father wants for us, we are all family. I don't know you other than on here, but my heart is with you. I would gladly watch your children every day. I know that by doing that I would be helping you with your and their future. This schooling is important. Stop hesitating, ask for the help that friends and family offered. Accept it openly, and at the time you accept ask them to be upfront with you about the bounderies. To let you know how much time they can help you with, that won't inconvenience them. They will appreciate it.
yes, I agree with the others, don't be afraid to ask for help, people want to help but don't want to be pushy. KWIM.. How are you doing girl? hope everyone is hang in there. We love ya all.
