You know what Brooke? I am getting pumped too. :wink: I feel really good about this. Brenda - I believe this is God's work too. Thanks for saying so, it's nice to hear it and very encouraging. Again, because I cant say it enough - THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR WORDS, THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's 45 minutes until the time the (cancelled) hearing was scheduled and I am praying for you and your family, Crystal. God is definitely working in this situation. I'm sure we are all on pins and needles to see what our Great and Almighty God does! God bless you! Blessings,
I just got my mail for the day. :cry: It is paperwork from the bio father's lawyer. The reason the hearing was cancelled was due to the father filing for custody. The paperwork is about 15 pages long. It is filled with lies. I cant even go into right now. I am in shock with what I just read. There will be another hearing sometime in Jan. I dont have a date yet. I cant stop shaking. My mom is here with me today and was here when I got the mail. She is strong and threw the paperwork and said this means nothing. God is bigger then any of this foolishness. Seconds later the phone rang and it was the bio mother calling (she hardly ever calls) she just was checking in. I broke down on the phone and told her what had happened. She did not cry, she was very calm and told me it would be ok. We have and will continue to allow her to see Jessie. If the bio father wins custody he wont let the bio mother have any contact. She will lose Jessie too. Here is the catcher - she is not ever a believer. Please forgive me for my lack of faith. I wish it wasnt so hard for me to find peace about this. And to act like I did infront of the bio mother. What kind of an example was that???? I need your prayers... Crystal
WHERE HAS HE BEEN FOR THE PAST FIVE YEARS???? I'm sorry, where does any guy think he can walk into a child's life like that and over night become a Daddy? Has he ever stayed up nights when she was sick? Has he ever held her on his lap and read her a favorite book ten times in a row? Has he ever rocked her to sleep when she's been scared? NO!!!! Well, I'll be praying that the court has enough sense to take all that into account, rather than just blood, when it makes its decision!
Crystal, did he know he had a child? I ask this not rereading the other posts. Can this bio. mother be trusted? You said she was calm, but if she stands to lose out, too, where's her angst? It just all seems so fishy- her calling just as the mail came in, no upset on her part. I would listen keenly when she's around, and watch how much you say at the same time. I'm not a trusting person, I guess, and I would cut all ties after this is all settled.
... but on a more tender note, at least she gets to be with you at Christmas if the hearing's been put off until January.
The bio mother has already signed off her rights. Her paperwork was done in Sept. The bio father was in Jessie's life off and on the first year. He would come to our house to visit her. When she was 16 mos old he stopped visiting.
Crystal: We are praying here for you all. this is so sad. I have just few questions for you was the father a good father when he seen her and how old is the father? Why all of sudden did he come and want in that little girls life? Did he marry and tell his new wife and she talk him into getting the girl back? Or did the babies mother talk him into it? Some thing is fishy about it why would the babies mother call after the mail came and stay very calm. Is she the women in that man's life again and the only way she can get the baby back is if she has the father not sign over the papers. I would be very carefully around the mother until this was all done something is fishy. Hang in there and you are in our prayers wish we could be closer to give you all a hug or two and to be there on court day just remember we are thinking of you all. Kris TX :lol:
((((((Crystal)))))) I'm so sorry for all the added stress you had today. This is truly a fiery trial. It is soooooo hard to sit in the furnace and trust our Heavenly Father, the Master Goldsmith and Silversmith. But do trust Him, He won't allow more than you can bear. Do you know why the bio father suddenly decided to try to take Jessie away? I'm still praying that the Lord would have His will in this situation and that He would give the judge wisdom and discerment. Blessings,
I trust the bio mother. Long story - too much to type, but trust me - I trust her. She is no way involved with the bio father again - they hate each to put it mildly. He is now with another woman, not married, but they have two children together. He leaves the country from time to time. He is from Mexico and is over here illegally. I wish that was enough to win this case but sadly its not. Is the bio father a good father you asked Kris? He seemed nice the times I would see him, but what kind of a man stops all contact with his child? He would go periods of four months and not see her when she was a very small baby, but shortly before her second b-day he stopped all together. I cant answer why he did that. I also cant answer why all of a sudden he wants to be back in her life. Maybe because he now has other children?? Who knows. As far as his age Kris - I cant say that I know forsure, but would guess mid 30's. Why? Jessie has been with us off and on since she was 3 wks old. Off and on because we were just helping out this struggling couple. It first started out as a day here and there. Then it turned into overnights, and then days at a time and eventually Jessie moved in. We had always talked about adopting her from the time she moved in with us, but the bio mother wasnt sure. Since the bio father stopped coming around we never thought we would have a problem. The bio mother never stopped visiting. When Jessie turned four the bio mother said we should adopt. We needed time to save the money and this past spring started the process. Jessie does not remember her bio father from those first few months to almost two. My husband is the only dad she knows. Jessie knows she is being adopted - she thinks she is extra special because she has two mommys. I wasnt going to share this before and I dont know why, but I will now. Jessie's bio mom is my husbands ex wife. Maybe I did tell you all before. So that means that some of my step children are Jessie's half siblings. The bio mom wants all the kids together. I feel like my life is a bit of a soap opera. My husband and I did this from day one because we thought we were doing something good. Over the years this little girl has become one of our own. I feel like we are best for her. If I had known years ago that it would end up coming to a big court battle, costing me tons of money and I might lose Jessie - I would still have taken her in. No regrets. I love her and always will. She will always be my child.
The man is in the US illegally, but he can take you to court and try to get custody of his child? Wow! The legal system boggles my mind. How about reporting him to the INS? Or would he be able to try for custody from Mexico? I hope I'm not being too nosy. It just never ceases to amaze me that cases like this (where a bio father ignores his child for three years and then out of the blue, thinks he can waltz right in and be the Daddy) even make it to court. Still praying....
Already tried to report him to INS. They dont care. Unless he breaks a law or commits a crime. Yes, I have many complaints about our legal system.
Crystal- what a bomb!!! I hope you are right in trusting her. Kris must sense what I do- that there's something just not kosher- but you know her and we don't.
Sorry to pop in so late in the day. I guess there are more issues than a "dead-beat" dad that I was assuming was the issue. God is sovereign. I'll try to encourage you with a dear friend of mine, Janet. Same deal with her son. She married a man who already had kids (Janet could never conceive). His youngest was a little boy, Tyler. They divorced a few years later and the boy wanted to be with Janet. The dad was a trucker and the mom was a, well, you can guess cuz she didn't care as long as she didn't have to take care of him. One day when Tyler was around 8yo he was in an auto accident. Janet went to court with Tyler as his representative cuz she knew that the bio parents only wanted cash from the settlement. Somehow, Janet has been recognized as his legal "parent" ever since. His bio mom has always lived just blocks away and he still would go see his brothers and his mom on occasion. This boy is now 20 years old and Janet is his mom. Period. And even our tainted legal system recognized it. I'll be praying for the judge to rule in the way God wants. And I believe that God would want Jessie with the parents she knows and loves, and with her siblings. I'll also pray that this doesn't become a custody dispute in Mexico. One more question, and feel free to tell me to bug off if you don't feel like talking, Crystal..... did the mom sign over custody to you and your husband? Or did she sign it over to the state? I'm just wondering what the dad can legally do in the instance that the mother signs over his child to the state. If he had to be notified and that is why he is stepping in now? I would think that the court would have to tell him if the mom signed over her rights. God is still in control! Praying with you, for you, and over you!
The mom signed rights to us - not the state. The bio father knew that she wanted us to adopt for a while. We live minutes away from the bio father. He still has not made any attempt to see Jessie or even phone her. We only want what is best for Jessie and to take her from the only stable home she has ever had and from the two people that have been consistent in her life doesnt seem right. Maybe I am being selfish not wanting to lose her, but she is loved like the children I gave birth to. The thought of her moving in with a man she doesnt know, in an atmosphere that is less then desirable makes me sick. As far as a custody despute in Mexico - couldnt happen. Jessie is an American citizen. Thanks again all for your concerns and prayers. Crystal
adoption I don't see anyway how you can loose her. He hasn't had contact with her in years. Does that not mean something in this day and age? I thought after 6 months that they were considered abandioned. That may be different with every state. I don't know. Thanks to God above I have only 1 husband and all kids are his and mine. I would crack under all that pressure. Prayers are with you and your family.
Crystal, I was praying for you today. I haven't had time to check in with everything going on but I did read a few posts that were written today. You just remember GOD IS GREATER THAN ANY PROBLEM WE HAVE!!!! God can handle all this! My prayers are still with you.
EVERYONE REMEMBER TO PRAY FRIDAY AT 11AM/10AM CST FOR CRYSTAL'S MEETING WITH HER LAWYER!!!!! We are all with you in spirit, Crystal. Love ya, girl!
