I'm back. Not that I ever said I was going to be gone. Truth of the matter I didnt' even know until a day before I was going on vacation that I was going. Hubby was suppose to schedule leave for October and he called and said if I wanted to go we had to go asap. Sooo I have been in SD showing off the baby for the last few weeks. While there my family who normally are my biggest fans of homeschooling were afraid I was taking on too much with Hubby leaving. Dh has gone on board with them too. He is worried about me. I am beginning to think they might be right. I dont' know. It is so hard. I mean these people love me and they aren't saying this because they are against homeschooling. They are just telling me to take the year off. Not to try to do everything while Hubby is gone. Maybe they feel bad that none of them will be close enough to help me out. Anyway thanks for letting me purge my feelings.
Well, that should free you up to come over more then I think its a wise decision too, though I know you are a very strong person and you could handle it, just give yourself the chance to spend more mommy time with your little guy, and the other 2 before they have to start with school. I'm always here if you need to talk.
Sarah, you're a diligent mom! I know that you're taking this matter seriously, and I don't want to put a burden on you either way. I'll just share some thoughts to throw into the process for you to consider. They may not be "right" for you. A friend of mine had surgery one year and felt like she had not completed many of the family's educational goals with the children. Yet, when they were tested, all four showed normal gains. Another friend had a difficult pregnancy, including an operation during the pregnancy, and a long recovery time afterward. Her older daughter sewed her maternity clothes, cloth diapers (with my serger, I'm happy to say), and mentored two friends in 4-H projects. The family focused on life, instead of books. The older daughter has graduated and is studying to be a midwife. Both families had four children. It seems like both mothers look back now and see that having the family home during the trials brought them closer together, were a comfort and help to the mom, and nothing important was lost academically that showed up on any test or that couldn't be added another year. In fact, the life-skills learned contributed to future vocational goals in some instances. I don't remember you ever mentioning difficulties in character or conduct with your children. All that, to say that if things are functioning well as a family now, adding the demands and schedules of someone else's school might actually cause more stress for you, and the young ones might be compromised in the opportunity to experience this chapter of life with you. Once again, these are merely thoughts to help balance out the lovingly-given concerns of your family. The Lord will help you sort out the issues and help you define your priorities.
I think your family may be right. It certianly is not a slam on you or a statement that you are weak. I am sure you could achieve homeschooling perfectly fine in your current situation. However, you may want to avoid all the frustration and stress also. Do what you feel is best for your family...and of course...you...if you are not on your game your family will not be either. Pray about it and see where the Lord is leading you. Your family and dh love you and just want to make sure you are not overwhelmed. I am sure part of it is that they feel helpless since they will not be around. I know you can homeschool and hold down the fort on your own...it can be done. However, this is not a decision you should make without prayer. Also, maybe it will make things easier on your dh to be away if he knows you are not stressed out. So consider that. I know after having my 3rd...I couldn't even keep my garden in check with a baby and homeschooling..LOL. I hope you check in more! Oh...so you will be sending your older two kids to school and staying home with your baby and toddler? How will things work in your new arrangement? Do you think stopping for a year will cause you to end home schooling altogether or do you think the kids will want to come home again? (well...I guess you wont' know that)
I just read Prairie....that is something to consider. Great thoughts. Just remain prayerful and willing to do what the Lord wants you to do. Honestly, if it was me...I would continue to home school. Yep...dead garden and all...homeschooling was worth it. lol. Wow...are we confusing you more? I am getting confused? Allow God to guide you here there are too many options! lol.
I have to agree with Praire.. it might help you get through the blues and make the time go alot faster... but it has to be up to you and your children how you would like to do it. I wish you the best and hope things work out for you all.
Has he been deployed before while you have home schooled? What would be different now, because of the babies? Do you have the option of trying to do the HS thing before sending to school? It may work out maybe a bit difficult until you get a routine going but it could. The older ones can take turns with the younger ones while you do one on one. Good thing the youngest can just hang out in a sling, bouncy seat, swing for awhile. Was this forum that said someone used the baby as part of schooling? Read it somewheres. Can you go home and then maybe in a few months and go visit family again? I don't know how long AF deployments are. Are they long like Army? We are Navy so our deployments are different. Even this next tour is going to be different than his other sea duties. I have been told it's harder on the family with a hubby on ships company than in a squadron. I will find out soon enough. It will be an adventure for sure. There are few others on here that are military wives so we know what it's like to be a part time single mom.
I can see BOTH sides! I know you're dh and your family are concerned for your welfare while he's gone! But, thinking about school brings back memories of required attendance at certain events, required participation in fundraisers, time running them to and from school---traffic, making sure there was gas in the car, getting the babies ready and in their car seats JUST when they had fallen asleep for nap time, etc., etc.! Then again, the time spent with the babies while the older ones are in school could be a relaxing time. But, there are schedules and quiet times that can be set up each day while homeschooling, so you get those quiet times needed. Also, you can go out when you need to, on your own schedule, so you don't ahve to rush and worry about forgetting something and trying to find socks, shoes, lunches, permission slips and homework before heading out the door, which is VERY stressful and time consuming! It may be LESS stressful to homeschool if you consider it from all angles!....
Thanks Amy I have never homeschooled with my DH gone for a whole year. You are right though somethings will be less stressful homeschooling. I dont' think it was the schooling so much as them knowing I wouldn't get out of the house much. DH was deployed for a few weeks once when were were homeschooling. I didn't leave the house the whole time. DH gets back Christmas 2008 so we are both very sure we will homeschool then. THe kids would miss too much school in the move otherwise. We are going to alaska and before we leave we want to visit our families for 3-4 weeks. None of our family has the funds to visit us in Alaska so that would be the last trip for a quite awhile.
I can see both sides, too. But what it comes down to is that your husband is saying to stop for a year. He is responsible for the family, both you and the children. He has both their and your best interests at heart. So to me, this is a submission issue. I think it's been taken out of your hands. Now, if he's saying "It's up to you!", then you need to prayfully consider the words of others and see if God is using them to direct you, or if they are just speaking out of misguided concern for you and the kids.
One thing you guys might want to consider is the adjustment period when he gets back. Dh is scheduled to deploy in January for 4-6 months, and for a long time I always said I would just move home with my parents when he was gone. But then I realized that both ds and I would have to adjust to that, and then when dh came home, we would have to adjust to missing grandparents, being in another town again, and daddy being back all at once. So I have decided we will just stay put. Dh has said it is up to me since I am the one who will be left, and our family is only 2 hours away, and I only have one child, so it is a little different, but you might consider that they would have those adjustments plus leaving their friends at school and moving. Whatever you decide, you can always come here for prayers and support!
Jackie, you are often the one to remind us to consider the submission issue! Thank you for that. I'm sorry that I missed seeing that hubby had joined with the rest of the family in your first post, Sarah. On the other hand, if he merely "got on board" with them and if this is not a strong conviction originating in his own heart between him and the Lord, then there's still room for discussion. Husbands and all Godly authority can be appealed to and reasoned with. (I'm not talking about what I sometimes do--argue and nag!) I'm talking about what we should do and what we prefer to do--hold things up together before the Lord. My beloved husband gives me wide latitude in decision-making, so when he feels strongly about something, it "behooves me" to follow his lead. So, yeah, these ideas need to be filtered through your relationship with your husband.
I would agree with this too, IF he was saying, "You are absolutely NOT to homeschool!" It didn't sound like that's where he was. He, as a great dh, is concerned for her and how things will go while he is gone. I read it more as, "Well, Honey, maybe they're right. Would it be hard for you to homeschool AND do everything else with me gone?" I'm thinking that if she said she would feel much more comfortable homeschooling (or vice versa), then he would want her to do that---whatever will be easiest and best for HER, since he'll be gone.... Anyway, that's what I based my comments on.....but maybe I misread what he was saying? Because if he DID say she shouldn't, then I TOTALLY agree with what Jackie said!
I have to agree with Jackie.. he is the man of the house and you are suppose to trust and go by him..
