Would you pray for this situation

[Brenda]

I was put in a position the week of Christmas where I had to report a co-worker for verbal and emotional abuse (towards a patient). I went to my Nurse Manager and she had asked that I put it in writing :shock: I came home that night and sat up until 3:00 am writing the letter (while the episode was still fresh in my mind) and gave the Nurse Manager the letter the next day when I went to work.

I knew that in putting the complaint in writing there was the possibility that the co-worker would be approached and retaliation was a possibility - but I was so disturbed by the episode that I was willing to take the risk.

My Nurse Manager approached me today, thanking me for "The very well written letter" :oops: and told me that they would be going to this co-worker the next time she is in (Thursday) to deal with the issue (my nurse manager and her boss). She told me that they would have to share my letter with her :shock: :shock: :shock: I told her that as I was writing the letter, I realized that was a possibility and was so upset by the episode that took place that I was willing to stand behind what I wrote and that I did fear retaliation (but that I would deal with it when it happened).

This co-worker has been approached in the past by our nurse manager about similar issues but other staff wouldn't put the complaint in writing fearing retaliation so she has gotten away with it. Now it lays on my shoulders... What did I get myself into?

I do not have any regrets about making the complaint - the patients are the reason why we have jobs and have the right to be treated with dignity and respect - not abused. My concern right now is that this lady will retaliate making life miserable for me.

Never in my career have I been put in this kind of position and it's not one I want to visit on a regular basis. God has blessed me with a wonderful career and the ability to reach others in a way that not everyone is able to do. Nursing is not a position I take as a joke and not one that I work in because of the "money" - I'd do it for free I love it that much.

Would you please pray that the Lord will protect me from any back lashing this co-worker my try (I have no doubt that she may try) and that I won't "stumble and fall" because of someone else's actions... Thank you!

In Him,
Brenda

[CrystalB9]

You should be proud of yourself Brenda - I know I am! :wink: I will lift you up in prayer that this co worker will not give you a hard time.
My aunt, cousin and SIL are all nurses and they love their jobs and take them very seriously too!
You did the right thing!!

[Brenda]

I don't regret making the complaint, I'm concerned at how vindictive this co-worker may be. In the past, she has claimed discrimination as a defense and from what I understand (from other co-workers) has gotten away with it. Race had absolutely NOTHING to do with it - she was my secret santa for Christmas (and I feel rotten for having to make the complaint, but the patients are my number one priority when I'm working).

God will look after this - I know He will. I just have a knot in my stomach right now (kind of like I did the same night I was writing the letter).

Brenda

[HeidiPA]

Brenda~
You definitely did the right thing. My mom is a nurse, and I know she would have done exactly what you did, as she takes her job very seriously also. And, let me just say out of respect to you, I couldn't do your job. So, thanks for doing it!
It's always hard to be the one who stands up for what is right, especially when no one else is willing to. Maybe now that you've gone out on the limb, so to speak, others won't be so scared to do the same if the situation presents itself again. If enough people report these acts, they'll be taken care of.
Good for you!
Heidi

[becky]

She turns it into a race thing?
She's black?
I hate when that gets done, but that's the way it gets played sometimes.
I'd start keeping a daily diary of you workday, even going by the half hour for entries.
That way you have a written, daily record of what does or does not go on.

Don't let her intimidate you.
I used to work with some black ladies who behaved like that , and while they can make you miserable, I don't see where it gets them.
We all did the same job for the same pay in the same worthless conditions.
Nobody won. Some just bossed their way through.

[becky]

She turns it into a race thing?
She's black?
I hate when that gets done, but that's the way it gets played sometimes.
I'd start keeping a daily diary of you workday, even going by the half hour for entries.
That way you have a written, daily record of what does or does not go on.

Don't let her intimidate you.
I used to work with some black ladies who behaved like that , and while they can make you miserable, I don't see where it gets them.
We all did the same job for the same pay in the same worthless conditions.
Nobody won. Some just bossed their way through.

[Brenda]

As if that wasn't enough, I called a co-worker of mine (closer to home) who is a part of the regional nursing council and a very involved member of our licencing association. I called because I've never encountered this type of situation before and wanted to know what happens when these investigations take place. (I told her that I had concerns about this lady getting revenge on me and she told me that I could go after her for harassment - not sure I want to get into a snowball effect of causing grief...)

I asked her whether I was to just leave it with the hospital to deal with or whether I had to go to the association too. Her bottom line was to call the registrar in the morning and ask for his advice describing the situation, but she did say that the associatoin will probably launch its own investigation (in case the hospital isn't able to do something about it). If I don't and three months down the road she were to hypathetically break a limb of a patient and it was investigated and found that I had concerns three months earlier that weren't brought forth, I could lose my license over it and be held responsible as well (guilty by association) :shock: At the association level, if it is investigated and something comes out of it, it rermains with her file whereas at the hospital if they discipline and she leaves her job for say, Red Cross or private duty, they may not neccessarily check her references or find out about this putting her in a position to continue these actions.

Appearently (through gossip), she has played the minority card in the past and has gotten away with it, but the fact that no one was willing to put their complaints in writing might be why she has gotten away with it (the Nurse Manager did tell me this).

Skin color makes absolutely no difference to me what so ever. Skin color doesn't make me any better than her - the only difference between her and I is that I am a sinner saved by Grace. God doesn't look at skin color and so neither should I. I hope that she doesn't turn this into a race issue - it never was to begin with - at least not from my perspective. Truth is, she did something that was inappropriate and abusive and it needs to be dealt with and if I was ever faced with a similar scenario with another person of the same 'skin color', I would report them as well (Please Lord, don't put me in a position where I have to do this).

I even told my nurse manager today that maybe by me standing up against this scenario, she'll become a better person out of it (although Sandra rolled her eyes) or the co-worker will find a job that is more compatable to her lifestyle, one that doens't put her out so much.

Should be intersting...

Brenda

[Trish]

Praying

[Brooke]

All of us who are in the care of nurses or have loved ones in the care of nurses thank you, Brenda! My mom is a nurse in a nursing home and I know that nursing is not something for everyone. I pray the Lord's will is accomplished by or in part by your action. I also pray that the Lord will sheild you from any weapon forged against you....just like He says He will do! :wink:

[Jackie]

I would think that filing a complaint with your supervisor (or whoever) would be enough to get you "off the hook" if there were future abuse. That is your official "chain of command"...should the hospital decide to ignore it, THEY should be the ones responsible, not you! But be that as it may.......

Praying for you in Ohio!

[Brenda]

I called our licensing board today and asked them about the scenario and whether I had to follow through with them or not. The GOOD NEWS is that I've done all that I have to do - the hospital will report it themselves if they feel the need to do so (and appearently they are good at doing that) - no risk of me losing my license over it (PTL). So I'm off the hook (as far as reporting the incident) and I'm not overly worried about revenge matters - God gave me shoulders - I can handle it and what I can't handle God will take for me.

Brenda

[Deena]

That's a tough situation, but God IS there for you! I will be praying for you, and that something good WILL come out of it for this lady! Maybe it will "wake her up" and she'll realize how she is actually acting! Sometimes you get in a rut and do without thinking. Anyway, only God knows, but you certainly did the right thing! When I was in college I was an R.A., and I had two times where I had to report things that "Friends" of mine did. It was so hard! The first instance the girl was livid with me, but I said I had a job I had to do and I had to follow the rules or quit my job. I told her maybe in the long-run she'd see that it was for the best. I don't know if she ever did though. The second one was an even worse situation, and it's one of the hardest things I had to do, cuz this girl and I were really close. But she forgave me, we talked and prayed together, and we were in each others weddings a few years later. It's always best to do the right thing, even though the consequences may be painful! That's what God asks of us! But He also promises to be with us and help us and give us peace. (See my favorite text below). I will also pray for the lady concerned, that God will impress upon her heart somehow!

[Brenda]

I worked with this lady today. I'm sure she knows it was me that filed the complaint - no big deal. She never said two words to me the entire shift (and she usually talks to me several times, ask me for help, etc). If it stays that way, it would be ok. We'll have to see what happens in the future...

Brenda

[Deena]

We'll keep praying for you!

[Anonymous]

Praying here~
Tammy