Please pray for us

[CrystalB9]

I feel like my plate is full right now, but God seems to think I need to make more room. I have asked for prayer for my son. The situation is better, but far from over.

We are adopting a little girl Jessie. She is 5 and the most beautiful, sweet child. She has lived with us off and on since birth. The adoption is almost final. We got a phone call this weekend from her biological father saying he is going to be fighting us for custody. We are beside ourselves. Jessie doesnt even know him. We can not afford a court battle. The adoption isnt even paid for in full.
We are crying out to God for answers. Please pray we dont loose our Jessie. She is apart of our family. We are her mommy and daddy.
Please, please pray...

[Jackie]

Praying for your family and for Jessie. I'm not sure just what to say; I know it hurts to be afraid of having to give up a precious child that is already part of your family. You're not alone in this.

[Brooke]

This is the exact reason that my husband has not committed to being foster parents. We'll be praying for all of you!

[HeidiPA]

Crystal~
As you already know, you're in my thoughts and prayers!
Heidi

[abcTammy]

Praying here.
Tammy

[Brenda]

Crystal, I can feel your pain. We are praying for your family.
Brenda

[KrisRV]

You are in our prayers. I hope it works for you all. Got to be one of the hardest things you all are going through. But, we are praying. Keep us inform and let us know what happens. Good luck and GOD BLESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Kris TX :lol:

[Mom2ampm]

Hope everything works out for you and Jesse. I will be praying for you!!!

[Trudy Powell]

Crystal,

I know this is such a stressful situation. I can't imagine having to wait and wonder like that.

I went to our church's annual women's retreat this past weekend. It was really great. The theme was "Dwelling in His Presence." The speaker was wonderful and really hit the mark with most women (and humans in general) when she said control is a big issue with most of us - we want to control our circumstances.

She mentioned Job 38-40:2 where God is reminding Job of how little control he had over anything and how much power God has (it's humbling to re-read those chapters). A couple of statements the speaker made and that I wrote down because I really wanted to remind myself of them were: "God doesn't need us to dwell in His presence, He wants us to." Also, "If you really believe that God is in control, then you can relax and watch Him work." One more, and this was one of my favorites, "You don't have to feel capable, you have to believe He is." I really needed to be reminded of these things.

These trials are so hard to understand. I'll be praying for you and your family as you seek the Lord and never forget that He loves Jessie even more than you do. She sounds like a special little girl.

[CZ4kids]

Sending it up to God right now.

[Jimmie Lu]

How heart wrenching!! I can not believe this one. You know I am praying for you all. This just stinks. God will prevail don't worry. (easy for me to say) If you or Rod need to talk,Larry and I are here for you!!! This is probably the last thing you needed with the trip comming and all. You are in my prayers.

[CrystalB9]

The tears are streaming down my face right now. Thank you all so very much for your heart felt words and prayers.
You will never know how much they mean to me.

[CrystalB9]

If you all could please continue to pray. After some meetings tonight we found out this will be a long, expensive court battle. We are at God's mercy.
Please pray that the finances come in. Please pray for God's grace.
Thank you so much.

[Anne]

(((((Crystal))))) I'm praying for you. I'm asking God to perform a miracle on your behalf.
Blessings,

[Brenda]

Crystal,
God will make a way - I believe that to the core of my soul. Still praying...
Brenda

[KrisRV]

Crystal:

We are still praying for you and hope every thing works out.
Keep your head high for the little ones.
I know it's hard but they need you too.

Kris TX :lol:

[CrystalB9]

We just received notice in the mail, we go to court Thursday December 16th at 2:10 pm. This will be a hearing to determine whether we can proceed with the adoption without the biological fathers consent.
Your prayers for us, our daughter, the bio father and the judge will be greatly appreciated.

[Trish]

You have my prayers. I can't imagine what you are going through.

[Jackie]

Will be praying that you can celebrate Christmas this year as a complete family, with this all settled and behind you, and not having to give it another thought.

[CrystalB9]

Thank you. As always, your thoughts and prayers are appreciated.
I am trying to stay calm and remind myself God is in control.

[Jimmie Lu]

You know we are praying for you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :wink:

[Brooke]

I'm so sorry I missed it when you updated this thread, Crystal. I'll continue to pray daily for you family.

[CrystalB9]

I feel like a hypocrite to say this but we are very scared and worried. My signature says worry looks around and faith looks up. We are looking up, but cant help but have very frazzled nerves right now. I keep praying for peace and for God to take this horrible knot out of my stomach. I am finding it hard to focus on daily tasks. My mind races with thoughts of not having her for Christmas and how confuesed she will be if we lose her. What will her little mind be thinking?
I really try to focus on God's love for her and us. I am just having a hard time with the court date approaching. I am praying for strength and peace to get into next week.

[HeidiPA]

Crystal~
I know that God tells us in the Bible that we aren't to worry about tomorrow, that tomorrow will take care of itself. However, it's also part of our human nature to worry. God knows that, and He's not going to hold a little worry against you. I'd almost think you were crazy if you weren't at all worried.
Just know that you are being prayed for, that there's alot of people out there who care for you and love you, and that, no matter what, we're going to continue to love you and uphold you in our prayers.
I believe that God has a special plan for little Jessie, and I'm looking forward to hearing the outcome of your court meeting next Thursday.
Heidi

[Jackie]

Crystal, AMEN to everything Heidi said!!! And don't feel like a hypocrite. You're not; you're a mommy concerned about all the "what if's" as it relates to one of your precious children. I'd be tearing my hair out if I had to deal with what you're going through! We're all behind you in this!

[becky]

Couldn't we all agree to lift Crystal and her family in prayer on the day of their hearing, during the hearing, so that they could be bathed in prayer as they face all this?

I know different time zones apply, but it can be figured out by the individual.

[HeidiPA]

That is a wonderful idea, Becky.
We should definitely do that.
Prayer is a powerful weapon, and there's strength in numbers.
I'm in!
Heidi

[Brenda]

Crystal, I really feel for you. While the situations were completely different I do know all to well what you are struggling with (except in our case it was the mortgage ordeal). Mom kept saying to me "Maybe the Lord is trying to teach you to walk closer in faith with Him, to trust Him fully with all of this, to let Him have FULL control of the situation..."

Human nature so desperately wanted me to try to maintain some control in all of it (and what a whirl spin it was for me). It wasn't until I relinquished ALL control over to God that I felt complete peace (and what a relief it was for me) about what we were facing (granted, what you are faced with is far different than what we faced and I can't imagine being able to have the same "I don't care anymore attitude" that I HAD to develop in order to get me through it - if I were in your shoes, I'd be sick just like what you describe and I know I wouldn't be able to say "You know what I don't care anymore").

I don't have an easy solution for you - I wish I could take this all away from you - the heart ache that you as a family have to go through (at the hands of a "man" who has had no part in her life and all of a sudden decides "Poof! I want to be an instant Dad and expect the child to adapt!").

God knows the outcome and He's knows what's best for you, your family and for Jessie. While I can't take this away from you (I would if I could though), I can pray for you along with all the others who are praying for you and for your family. In the mean time, as hard as it is, hang in there. You know what - forget the schooling for right now - concentrate on your family. If you live in an area where the snow is flying - go outside and make a snowman, snow angels and all that fun stuff (assuming it snowed in PA - if not come see us, we just got swamped with 7 inches and are expecting 15 more on Saturday!!!). I call that reality teaching - teaching them about family ties and love - something far more important than numbers.

Brenda

Gracious and Loving Father, Lord we thank you for the group of parents here who care for the children You have entrusted to each of us and we as that You would help each of us to be the parents that You would have us to be. Lord, we think of Crystal and her family right now as they face some really tough struggles in the days ahead and we ask that You would place a hedge of protection around this family and hold them strong through out all of the trials that they face. Lord we think of Jessie and how all of this affects her Lord and we ask that you would keep her safe from all harm. Lord help Crystal to feel peace amidst all that she faces. Help her to focus on what matters most - You and the family that You have entruated to her. Lord I pray that in all of this Crystal would be a stronger person and that this will all be used somehow this would be used to further Your kingdom. In Jesus' precious name we pray, AMEN

[Brooke]

Amen to Brenda's prayer, Father!!!!

Crystal, I don't mean to pry, so if you aren't comfortable answering this please don't think I'll be offended. Have you ever thought about fasting for Jessie? You might already be doing this. I will be fasting a meal daily for Jessie until the Lord gives your family the resolve you so desperately need. I would encourage any who feel led to join in fasting for Jessie and all of Crystal's family. I truly believe this is a spiritual battle and I am a fighter! Let's all fight for this family together...the Lord will honor our collective prayers, ladies!

[CrystalB9]

Words cant describe the way I am feeling right now. For a group of people to pull together for someone they have never met... I dont know if I can ever fully express how appreciative I am of all of you.

Becky - thank you for your idea of prayer for me and my family next Thursday the 16th. The court hearing is at 2:10 eastern time. Our prayers are that the judge comes to a decision that day and for the decision to be for Jessie to stay with her family (us) permanently. She is 5 and will need to attend court with us. She is a very shy, little girl so prayers for her that she wont be scared. The biological mother and father are both suppose to be there. I hope this doesnt sound mean, but we are hoping the bio father doesnt even show. The mother has already signed all paperwork and is very supportive for this adoption. I would also like prayer for our lawyer and the judge.

Thank you for the beautiful prayer Brenda.

Brooke, I think that is a wonderful idea. Honestly I have never fasted before, but that might help give me peace about the situation. It might help me give it to God totally, which is what I am desperately trying to do.

Again, thanks to all of you so willing to think and pray for my family. I have cut and pasted all of your responses and prayers to put in Jessie's baby book. I want her to know how many people supported us.

There is power in prayer.

[Trish]

Crystal I have been reading the posts and my heart goes to you and your family. My prayers are with you. I pray for that Jessie will be home with you where she belongs.

[Amanda]

Here is a pic Crystal sent me to post -- What a cutie!
http://www.atozteacherstuff.com/images/crystal.jpg

[CrystalB9]

I thought it might be nice to put a face with a name. This is my beautiful Jessie!! :D

Thanks Amanda!!

[CrystalB9]

Oh, the picture was taken after a field trip to our local fire company in October for fire prevention month. She loves hats!! :wink:

[HeidiPA]

Crystal~
She is an absolutely gorgeous little gir! (as you already know)
I know how much you enjoy her!
Thanks for thinking to post a picture.
Heidi

[Jimmie Lu]

I am on board!!!!!!

[becky]

Crystal, you're a better Christian than I.
If someone was trying to take my Jeannie away I'd be planning... I don't know what.

Maybe the vermin will go away quietly.

I have to tell you, though-
Kevin and Jeannie each have a different father.
I had no moral training when I got pregnant with Kevin when I was 20.
Although I have a judgement for child support, one of the reasons I never pushed to collect was that the bio. male said he'd take Kevin away if I did.
I was young and ditzy, he was twice as old and knew I'd be worried.
Even just a few years ago, I held my breath when we changed Kevin's last name, because I know the other biological parent has some say.
The worm I was involved with had no more interest in a child than did the man in the moon.

I hope it goes the same way for you- that perhaps This worm has an agenda that disappears once the judge gets done with him.

As a mother, though, I know it's too hard to get your hopes up.

[CrystalB9]

The adoption papers were served this past summer. The bio father told us he was going to fight for custody in the beginning of October. Jessie has lived with us most of her life. It has felt very long. You know?? I almost cant take it anymore.
I am so scared that the judge wont make a decision this Thursday and I will have to continue to live with this knot in my stomach for even longer. There is a chance the judge wont make a decision this week. I am praying for finalization as much as I am praying we dont lose our daughter. I would love to feel peacful for Christmas. I have been on edge and I dont know about all of you, but I tend to control the temperment of my household. I try - I really do try to run my home as normal as possible, but it is always there, in the back of my mind an heavy on my heart that I may lose my child. I just really pray by Christmas this will all be behind us.

[Brenda]

Ouch! Here comes a skeleton from my closet...

I had my oldest child (Christian) when I was 18 years old. His "father" (I sometimes refer to him as being a sperm donor only - sorry) didn't want anything more to do with me when I told him I was pregnant. Long story short, I was eventually put in a position where I was asked to go after him for support payments. I initially did but when he threatened me with joint custody jargen, I dropped it like a hot potato.

A couple years later, the issue came up again but I was told he was going to file for sole custody! I was sick to my stomach - here was a leech who wanted nothing to do with me while I was preganat and at that point had seen Christian all of maybe 6 times in his lifetime (I think Christian was about 6 or 7 by then). I was so upset, I called a lawyer and this is what she had told me...

In Canada, absolutely anybody on the face of the earth can apply for custody of any child (I could ask for custody of Jessie), but when it goes to court, the judge looks at the relationship the child has with the seeker (if that's the right word to use) and if none (or very little of one) exists, the chances of that happening are slim to none. In the end, the scenario that we faced at the time was again dropped and so far his 'father' hasn't tried to pull anything off on us.

I'm not really sure how different the laws are between countries but my prayer is that logic and common sense will prevail and that the 'leech' will have a change of heart, realizing what he is doing to Jessie and to everyone else and decide that the absolute best way he could love her would be to 'let her go' (not that he's had a lot of contact in the first place).

This is heart wrenching and gut wrenching. Crystal, hang in there. Think of the Footprints story - it is now that you only see one set of foot prints on the beach - and it is now that God IS carrying you through all of this - even though it doesn't feel that way to you right now. This all somehow fits into His perfect plan for your life - I continue to pray for you about all of this. I've even prayed that if the biological father has any skeletons in his closet that they will surface prior to the court date to get him out of the picture...

God will make a way

Brenda

[blessedmom]

Crystal,
My heart aches for you and Jessie, little darling. I hope that bright, happy, beautiful smile will never leave her. You and your family are in my prayers. I'm also praying for your lawyer (that he will win; that Jessie will be yours forever) and the judge (that he will make the right decision).

There's a saying: "The Lord will either calm your storm or allow it to rage while He calms you." Well, I'm praying for both!

[Anne]

Crystal,

Just wanted to let you know I'm still praying for you. Will be especially praying on Thursday. Thank you for sharing the photo of Jessie, what a sweetheart! My heart goes out to you as you face these last few days of testing before the court date. Just lean on the Lord and allow Him to give you peace. (Easy to say, but oh, so tough to do!) God bless you.

[CrystalB9]

Again, I want to thank each of you for your thoughts and prayers. My family and I appreciate it very much. It has helped comfort us a great deal.
We are anxious for Friday - to have Thursday be behind us and hopefully be at peace and start to enjoy the holiday season.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!!

[Mom2ampm]

I'm praying that you get to keep your beautiful little girl!!!!!

[CrystalB9]

Ok now I am freaking out. My lawyer's secretary just called to tell me that Thursday's hearing has been cancelled!!!!! :shock:

I have had concerns with my lawyer before and now they are even greater because she did not leave a reason why with her secretary. Just to tell me that the court filed something and we are to come in and talk to her this Friday. I think this is horrible for her to not tell me what was filed! Now I have to wait, not knowing what is going on.

If anyone out there is in the legal field and could possibly tell me why and what the court itself could have filed???????

I am sorry if this is coming across like I have no faith what-so-ever. In the back of my mind I am praying this is a God thing, but my pounding heart needs to calm down a little first.

[Trish]

Dear Lord please give Crystal comfort in this time. Please give her peace in her heart. I pray Lord that you will be beside them in this time. Lord I know all things are in your hands and you know what is best. Please Lord help them to see that Jessie is loved and wanted by Crystal and her family. Reach down now and give this family a peace like only you can give. We pray in Jesus Christ's name and for his sake. And all of God's people said Amen.

[Jackie]

Amen and amen!!! Hang in there!!! You might want to call your lawyer and ask her (yeah, I know! Getting past a secretary is next to impossible!)

Tina's the one with legal background. She's not been following this thread, so you might want to send her a PM and ask her. You know we're all praying for you!!!

[Brooke]

I agree about calling your lawyer. They are working for you, and even if you get the secretary you might at least be able to find out what the court filed. I would guess those records are public domain?????

[Brooke]

Something else just dawned on me. Maybe a continuance would be a way the Lord made for the biological dad to get worn down and give up????? The Lord knows your love and determination. I realize that you don't know yet what the court even filed, but there are wonderful possibilities that could be being arranged from above! :D

[CrystalB9]

Thank you all for your comforting words. I am only getting voice mail when I call my lawyers office. Uggg.... I even tried calling the court house to see if I could find out what was filed - but no luck.
I dont like to get my hopes up, but for now I am finding peace in the chance that this is my heavenly fathers way of taking care of the situation. God knows how badly I was fretting about even going to the courthouse. I am praying that maybe the bio father cancelled or signed the adoption papers or the judge filed to allow us to proceed without even a hearing???????
I have to admit I am very frustrated with my lawyer to leave me hanging like this. I pay her alot of money - she was hired to do a job for me and part of that job is to keep me informed.
God is good and I am calmer now - thanks again all of you for caring so much. :wink:

[Anonymous]

Crystal,

I couldn't help, but think of a time in my life when I was soo very scared when you were talking about your fear. I have 2 dds. I had an abusive husband who I left after 5 years of marriage. My greatest fear was that he would get visitation rights without supervision or he would get custody. I felt so alone and scared. I had no one to talk to (other than the Lord). No one else understood what I was going through. I laid in my bed and cried harder than I had ever cried before. I thought all hope was lost for me. How could I raise 2 girls without his help? How could I go back to him? for it would be certain death. I thought how could I even think about going back to him. Please God send me someone to talk to. Please help me. I began to sob harder. Then, A vision came I saw the hands of the Lord. I was standing on top of them and He raised me up. For the first time I had peace. I knew God was in control. I just had to give the situation over to Him. I had to trust Him completely. Just so you'll know, My exhusband is no longer in our lives. I've remarried. My husband now is my best friend. Not only will God answer our prayers, but sometimes he adds an exclamation mark. We lift you up in our prayers. God will give you peace. If not today, tomorrow.

Blessings,
Melanie

[CrystalB9]

Thank you Melanee for sharing your story. Praise God...

[becky]

I think Satan is trying to discourage you, Crystal.
We were all planning to pray for you Thursday and now the hearing is canceled.
I think we should all still gather and pray anyway!!
Satan doesn't want all these voices united in prayer to the Living God that has the last say in this whole thing.
Anything that would keep you, and us, away from a time of fellowship in prayer, he'll throw in front of you.
If he can get you scared and worrying about how it will all work out, especially now that the hearing was canceled, he has won.
I'll still pray Thursday as planned. Anyone else?

[Jackie]

I'm in! And again for whenever the hearing is sceduled. We're with you, Crystal, whatever it takes!

Ladies, don't forget to pray for Crystal's husband who is trying to be strong for her and the kids right now! He has a lot of responsibility on his shoulders, and needs just as much support.

[Brooke]

I've been praying and fasting every morning for Jessie, but I'll be on for Thursday at a specific time if someone requests it. My computer shows odd posting times, so we need to cooridanate a time for all zones and without looking, I can't remember which zone Crystal is in.

Anyway, pick a time (and zone for that time :wink: ) and I'll stop everything to pray again.

[CrystalB9]

Wow, you all are so great.
I am in PA - eastern time. The court hearing was scheduled for 2:10 pm tomorrow, Thursday. Friday morning at 11:00 I meet with my lawyer to find out what is going on.

I have to tell you all that I have faith that my lawyer has good news for me. After talking to my mom she reminded me that the hearing was cancelled, not resheduled. I have hundreds of people praying for me. She laughed at me (in a motherly way) because we talk of faith and the power of prayer and yet when this phone call happened I thought the worse. Well she is thinking the best. She said to have faith, that this is the work of God. He is saving me from even going into the court room. She knows more then anyone how this has effected me. She is sure this is an answer to our prayers.

I am trying my very best to think that positive. However, it is my child and the not knowing is hard.

ALL your posts, prayers, stories and comments have been a wonderful comfort to me. I have printed out all of them and read them often to uplift me and to share with my husband (Rod).

[becky]

Not to get off the subject, but I can't get the time right on this site even when I follow the directions .

[Brooke]

Crystal, your last post reminded me of when Peter was in prison and his brothers and sisters in Christ were together praying fervently for him. We all know what happened in his prison cell!!!!......well, he goes to the church and knocks at the door and they all think it couldn't be him! How silly we can be! They had invested countless hours and energy in prayer believing only to doubt when those prayers had been answered in a miraculous way. When are we ever gonna learn???!!!! :D

I will stop and pray tomorrow at 1:10pm CST and praise God for his intervention (in what ever manner He interviened :wink: ) and again I'll pray Friday at 10am CST while you meet with your lawyer.

We have every confidence in our Lord!

[CrystalB9]

Brooke - That's great! Thanks for reminding me of Peter.

JESUS CHRIST SET THE PERFECT EXAMPLE. "But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:3-5) These verses point out aspects of His DIVINE PURPOSE for both Jesus Christ's trials and tribulations, and ours. PERSEVERING PROVES OUR FAITH. "I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me." (Phil. 4:13)

[Brooke]

OH, WOW!!!! That just reminded me of Hebrews 11 (somewhere in that chapter). Remember how Abraham's faith was proven? He laid Isaac on the alter because he knew that the Lord could raise him from the dead to fulfill God's covenant with him. Without that work, or action, Abraham's faith would have been dead. Instead, he showed his faith by his actions. Talk about trusting God!

Wow! I'm getting pumped up! :D

[Brenda]

(Our dumb computer was down for a couple days until we could get it reloaded)

Anyway Crystal, forget about phoning the lawyer's office - land on their doorstep - they can't ignore (or avoid) you then.

This is God's work - something BIG is in the making and I believe that this is all good. Still praying for you.

Hugs,
Brenda

[CrystalB9]

You know what Brooke? I am getting pumped too. :wink: I feel really good about this.

Brenda - I believe this is God's work too. Thanks for saying so, it's nice to hear it and very encouraging.

Again, because I cant say it enough - THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR WORDS, THOUGHTS AND PRAYERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Trish]

I am on eastern time also. I will be praying. God has ways of working things out.

[Anne]

It's 45 minutes until the time the (cancelled) hearing was scheduled and I am praying for you and your family, Crystal. God is definitely working in this situation. I'm sure we are all on pins and needles to see what our Great and Almighty God does! God bless you!
Blessings,

[CrystalB9]

I just got my mail for the day. :cry:
It is paperwork from the bio father's lawyer. The reason the hearing was cancelled was due to the father filing for custody. The paperwork is about 15 pages long. It is filled with lies. I cant even go into right now. I am in shock with what I just read. There will be another hearing sometime in Jan. I dont have a date yet.
I cant stop shaking.
My mom is here with me today and was here when I got the mail. She is strong and threw the paperwork and said this means nothing. God is bigger then any of this foolishness. Seconds later the phone rang and it was the bio mother calling (she hardly ever calls) she just was checking in. I broke down on the phone and told her what had happened. She did not cry, she was very calm and told me it would be ok.
We have and will continue to allow her to see Jessie. If the bio father wins custody he wont let the bio mother have any contact. She will lose Jessie too. Here is the catcher - she is not ever a believer.
Please forgive me for my lack of faith. I wish it wasnt so hard for me to find peace about this. And to act like I did infront of the bio mother. What kind of an example was that????
I need your prayers...

Crystal

[Jackie]

WHERE HAS HE BEEN FOR THE PAST FIVE YEARS????

I'm sorry, where does any guy think he can walk into a child's life like that and over night become a Daddy? Has he ever stayed up nights when she was sick? Has he ever held her on his lap and read her a favorite book ten times in a row? Has he ever rocked her to sleep when she's been scared? NO!!!!

Well, I'll be praying that the court has enough sense to take all that into account, rather than just blood, when it makes its decision!

[becky]

Crystal, did he know he had a child?
I ask this not rereading the other posts.

Can this bio. mother be trusted?
You said she was calm, but if she stands to lose out, too, where's her angst?
It just all seems so fishy- her calling just as the mail came in, no upset on her part.
I would listen keenly when she's around, and watch how much you say at the same time.

I'm not a trusting person, I guess, and I would cut all ties after this is all settled.

[becky]

... but on a more tender note, at least she gets to be with you at Christmas if the hearing's been put off until January.

[CrystalB9]

The bio mother has already signed off her rights. Her paperwork was done in Sept.

The bio father was in Jessie's life off and on the first year. He would come to our house to visit her. When she was 16 mos old he stopped visiting.

[KrisRV]

Crystal: We are praying here for you all. this is so sad. I have just few questions for you was the father a good father when he seen her and how old is the father? Why all of sudden did he come and want in that little girls life? Did he marry and tell his new wife and she talk him into getting the girl back? Or did the babies mother talk him into it? Some thing is fishy about it why would the babies mother call after the mail came and stay very calm. Is she the women in that man's life again and the only way she can get the baby back is if she has the father not sign over the papers. I would be very carefully around the mother until this was all done something is fishy. Hang in there and you are in our prayers wish we could be closer to give you all a hug or two and to be there on court day just remember we are thinking of you all.

Kris TX :lol:

[Anne]

((((((Crystal)))))) I'm so sorry for all the added stress you had today. This is truly a fiery trial. It is soooooo hard to sit in the furnace and trust our Heavenly Father, the Master Goldsmith and Silversmith. But do trust Him, He won't allow more than you can bear.

Do you know why the bio father suddenly decided to try to take Jessie away?

I'm still praying that the Lord would have His will in this situation and that He would give the judge wisdom and discerment.

Blessings,

[CrystalB9]

I trust the bio mother. Long story - too much to type, but trust me - I trust her.
She is no way involved with the bio father again - they hate each to put it mildly. He is now with another woman, not married, but they have two children together.
He leaves the country from time to time. He is from Mexico and is over here illegally. I wish that was enough to win this case but sadly its not.

Is the bio father a good father you asked Kris? He seemed nice the times I would see him, but what kind of a man stops all contact with his child? He would go periods of four months and not see her when she was a very small baby, but shortly before her second b-day he stopped all together. I cant answer why he did that. I also cant answer why all of a sudden he wants to be back in her life. Maybe because he now has other children?? Who knows. As far as his age Kris - I cant say that I know forsure, but would guess mid 30's. Why?

Jessie has been with us off and on since she was 3 wks old. Off and on because we were just helping out this struggling couple. It first started out as a day here and there. Then it turned into overnights, and then days at a time and eventually Jessie moved in. We had always talked about adopting her from the time she moved in with us, but the bio mother wasnt sure. Since the bio father stopped coming around we never thought we would have a problem. The bio mother never stopped visiting. When Jessie turned four the bio mother said we should adopt. We needed time to save the money and this past spring started the process. Jessie does not remember her bio father from those first few months to almost two. My husband is the only dad she knows. Jessie knows she is being adopted - she thinks she is extra special because she has two mommys. I wasnt going to share this before and I dont know why, but I will now. Jessie's bio mom is my husbands ex wife. Maybe I did tell you all before. So that means that some of my step children are Jessie's half siblings. The bio mom wants all the kids together.

I feel like my life is a bit of a soap opera. :(

My husband and I did this from day one because we thought we were doing something good. Over the years this little girl has become one of our own. I feel like we are best for her. If I had known years ago that it would end up coming to a big court battle, costing me tons of money and I might lose Jessie - I would still have taken her in. No regrets. I love her and always will. She will always be my child.

[Anne]

The man is in the US illegally, but he can take you to court and try to get custody of his child? Wow! The legal system boggles my mind. How about reporting him to the INS? Or would he be able to try for custody from Mexico? I hope I'm not being too nosy. It just never ceases to amaze me that cases like this (where a bio father ignores his child for three years and then out of the blue, thinks he can waltz right in and be the Daddy) even make it to court.

Still praying....

[CrystalB9]

Already tried to report him to INS. They dont care. Unless he breaks a law or commits a crime.

Yes, I have many complaints about our legal system.

[becky]

Crystal- what a bomb!!!

I hope you are right in trusting her.
Kris must sense what I do- that there's something just not kosher- but you know her and we don't.

[Brooke]

Sorry to pop in so late in the day.

I guess there are more issues than a "dead-beat" dad that I was assuming was the issue. God is sovereign. I'll try to encourage you with a dear friend of mine, Janet. Same deal with her son. She married a man who already had kids (Janet could never conceive). His youngest was a little boy, Tyler. They divorced a few years later and the boy wanted to be with Janet. The dad was a trucker and the mom was a, well, you can guess cuz she didn't care as long as she didn't have to take care of him. One day when Tyler was around 8yo he was in an auto accident. Janet went to court with Tyler as his representative cuz she knew that the bio parents only wanted cash from the settlement. Somehow, Janet has been recognized as his legal "parent" ever since. His bio mom has always lived just blocks away and he still would go see his brothers and his mom on occasion. This boy is now 20 years old and Janet is his mom. Period. And even our tainted legal system recognized it.

I'll be praying for the judge to rule in the way God wants. And I believe that God would want Jessie with the parents she knows and loves, and with her siblings. I'll also pray that this doesn't become a custody dispute in Mexico.

One more question, and feel free to tell me to bug off if you don't feel like talking, Crystal..... did the mom sign over custody to you and your husband? Or did she sign it over to the state? I'm just wondering what the dad can legally do in the instance that the mother signs over his child to the state. If he had to be notified and that is why he is stepping in now? I would think that the court would have to tell him if the mom signed over her rights.

God is still in control! Praying with you, for you, and over you!

[CrystalB9]

The mom signed rights to us - not the state. The bio father knew that she wanted us to adopt for a while.

We live minutes away from the bio father. He still has not made any attempt to see Jessie or even phone her.

We only want what is best for Jessie and to take her from the only stable home she has ever had and from the two people that have been consistent in her life doesnt seem right.

Maybe I am being selfish not wanting to lose her, but she is loved like the children I gave birth to. The thought of her moving in with a man she doesnt know, in an atmosphere that is less then desirable makes me sick.

As far as a custody despute in Mexico - couldnt happen. Jessie is an American citizen.

Thanks again all for your concerns and prayers.

Crystal

[Lornaabc]

I don't see anyway how you can loose her. He hasn't had contact with her in years. Does that not mean something in this day and age? I thought after 6 months that they were considered abandioned. That may be different with every state. I don't know. Thanks to God above I have only 1 husband and all kids are his and mine. I would crack under all that pressure. Prayers are with you and your family.

[Trish]

Crystal, I was praying for you today. I haven't had time to check in with everything going on but I did read a few posts that were written today. You just remember GOD IS GREATER THAN ANY PROBLEM WE HAVE!!!! God can handle all this! My prayers are still with you.

[Brooke]

EVERYONE REMEMBER TO PRAY FRIDAY AT 11AM/10AM CST FOR CRYSTAL'S MEETING WITH HER LAWYER!!!!!

We are all with you in spirit, Crystal. Love ya, girl!

[Anonymous]

will pray at 11 too.

[Anonymous]

David said many times in Psalms to the Lord, "hear me speedily, O Lord" Psalms 143: 7a for example.

He also asked the Lord to make haste in Psalms 70: 1, 2 I believe the bio father is like the enemies of David. I believe just like in v. 2 where it says let the enemy be turned backward. God is going to prevail, and turn this man backward. My heart and our prayers are with you.

Many times David didn't feel like God was answering quick enough. And even though God was working David didn't always see God's work. I believe the same is happening here. Remember God promises that He will never leave us nor forsake us. Praying for you at 11.

God bless.
Melanee

[Jackie]

Got my timer set so I won't forget! You know how us HS'ers are when we're in the middle of lessons, and suddenly you look at the clock and it's an hour later,LOL! Well, I'm going to make sure it doesn't happen this time!

[KrisRV]

Crystal: You are in our prayers I hope and pray all went well today and will go good for you and your family.
Just asking the age of the father because sometimes if they are younger they don't know what they want.
I hope and pray things work out for you and the baby. It just still seems fishy but you know the mother, we don't .

Hang in there and keep the head high and remember we all are here for you and your family.

[Lornaabc]

let us know what took place today, please.
Lorna

[CrystalB9]

My apt on Friday went well. Not to get too long winded I will try and give the main points.

The hearing was cancelled due to the bio father filing an answer page to our termination paperwork that was filed. That is what I got in the mail that I wrote about the other day. It was filled with lies. The one truth that the bio father stated was that my husband and I are not related to Jessie. With that bit of info the judge decided that we would need a full day hearing. Our lawyer said this might end up being a hearing of character since a lot of what we both have to say will end up being his word against ours. She said we will need to get letters of character written.
Ok ready for this? I was thinking she said a hearing would take place in Jan. Well I got the J right but she said due to there only being one judge in our district right now that hears cases like this she said we will not have our hearing unti July!!!! :shock:
A little upset at first to hear that. I am anxious to have this behind us, but then I realized God is working something. Jessie cant be taken from us until this gets resolved. So first good thing - Jessie is safe with us till summer!! I know God is yelling at me to trust Him. I know He is working something great for my family. For now I have been given the gift of time. More time with Jessie, more time to build our case, more time to learn to trust in God and more time for prayers to be lifted up.
So until July we build our case. We have to prove that we are better for Jessie and that bonds have been built with us.

You all have been just awesome and I hope you all dont forget about us and keep the prayers coming in.

[Brooke]

Thanks for updating us on what is going on. I know I couldn't possibly forget about your family. God's timing is perfect, and timing might be everything in this case.

Have a blessed Christmas and enjoy every minute!

[Jackie]

Yes, sit back and enjoy your Christmas was ALL your family there! Don't worry about this summer, instead enjoy the time you have NOW.

Will her custody being constested effect your trip to Mexico?

We will continue praying for y'all!

[becky]

Whoa- the mission trip.
Funny how the bio father is from Mexico..........

[CrystalB9]

We only need permission from one bio parent to take a child out of the country and the bio mother will give it to us - we have already talked to her.
The only thing that could stop us would be $$. Court isnt cheap, especially this kind of battle. God is good and if we were meant to go on this mission then He will provide. As of now we are still working and planning on it. :wink:

[Jackie]

GOOD!!! Money will come in!

[abcTammy]

Happy to hear your news of delay. Thoughts and prayers for your little one.
Tammy

[CrystalB9]

I have a really, busy, crazy week of dentist apts, last minute shopping and so on. I wanted to take the time now to wish you all a very Merry Christmas. You have all touched my heart with your prayers of compassion and concern. I am looking forward to Christmas - a day to put all other thoughts on hold and focus and thank God for my family.
Thank you for loving the one that I love.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! :wink:

[Brenda]

Crystal,
I found some of Kathy Troccoli's music and one song that fits this whole situation (of giving it to God and everything that has been shared here) is "He will make a way" (she sang this when I was at the Women of Faith Conference in Connecticut in October and it is absolutely amazing - as I listen to the words to the song I can see her sharing her testimony with us (amazing) and it reminds me so much of your situation.

Having all of this, I hope that you have had an awesome Christmas and that you are feeling a little more peaceful about it all. If you have the chance to listen to her song, you really should. It is AMAZING!

Brenda

[CrystalB9]

Thanks Brenda,
I will look for that song. Thank you for thinking of me. My dh is a big music lover and often finds comfort in songs and since being married to him I have found the same comfort. When my day gets busy and I dont have or didnt make the time for devotions I turn on our local Christian radio station and their music can minister to my heart.

We did have a wonderful Christmas - thank you for asking. It was nice to put all thoughts of court aside and focus on family. I hope you all had a great Christmas too!